Storybook

I think a lot about what my story will be. Everyone has one yet finding it can be really difficult. The kind of story you want to tell your children when you have them is the story I mean. With every day you are in fact a writer so then which story do we tell? It can be a story of overcoming life's obstacles or one of defeat giving up dreams and opportunities through your life. This last year has been really difficult for me. I've had a friend pass on and a relationship that meant a lot to me end. I quit college for a semester and spent time dealing with crippling anorexia and depression. After all of this I can't help but feel that God has more for me than hurt and sadness. He has saved my life on more than one occasion and in more than one way but why. I have little to offer. I have no money to give to the poor,  no degree to help people with through a job, and I have no one to support or support me. What can I do is a question I ask myself daily. The thing is God uses the least likely of people. Moses was no public speaker and he lead God's people through the desert. Joseph was the youngest kid and after becoming a jailbird and a slave he was put second in command of Egypt. David, Mary, Ruth, Paul, and countless others were chosen out of some misfortune or odd circumstance. In the story planned for me I can't help but feel that God will overcome my dragons. Even though I can't fight circumstances on my own God slays them in my place for His will. What better knight is there than God. That is the story I want my kids to hear. Not one of my own victories but the one of God in my life. Nothing else is really important.

Autumn!!!

I swear every time the wind blows I feel the need to get spooky. Fall has never been my favorite season but this year I am absolutely psyched to get the leaves off the trees. After many trips to target I have turned my room into an autumn wonderland. I literally bought leaves to throw around my bedroom. So I thought I would list some fall essentials for anyone who is as excited for this season as me.


One of the best things I did was fill mason jars my mom had with potpourri.  It smells amazing and looks incredibly tumblr-esk. Besides potpourri is super cheap and you can use decorative bowls or plates too. It's just really nice and pinecones look like fall. Mine also has sparkly mini pumpkins in it.

The second thing I've been loving for autumn is my marshmallow fireside candle from Bath and Body Works. It smells so good and the throw is awesome. I can literally smell it thirty feet away in a different room. It by far is not the only candle of mine from there as I have six not including wall scents and room sprays from there. There is just something about burning a candle that makes me feel like cold weather has arrived.

Lastly I bought some fall throw pillows. One is just a navy gingham print and it is actually so soft and my favorite. The second one says hello fall in gold and navy on a kind of canvas base still soft but not as much. They were both on sale for five dollars each with is a crazy good deal. They really tie the whole room together and are nice to watch videos and write on.

All of these things among many many others are the things that really remind me of autumn. All of this is despite the 100 degree heat with a slight breeze every couple of days. Anyways happy fall :)

A Job Title

Recently I have really been struggling with something. If God gave me all these spiritual gifts then what am I supposed to do with them. Isn't there some way to incorporate all my gifts into the workplace? I don't want to screw up getting a teaching degree just to find myself trying for medicine next. This has always been a problem for me you see growing up I changed my mind regularly on what I might be when I grew up. The possibilities then seemed endless whereas now I know how much time and effort that I won't enjoy goes into each job. Getting a college degree is expensive and jobs like lawyer and nurse are quickly becoming expensive. Growing up all I could see myself doing was getting married, keeping up the home, and having children of my own one day. That seemed like a dream come true but I quickly learned that society today has no place for a domestic woman. If I wanted to succeed in this world I would need a degree and a high paying job.

I am no good at math so that basically counts out all science and math degrees. English and History are something I loved as a kid but as an adult I struggle with writing long papers and history pays next to nothing. There isn't much left for a girl who only really likes fashion and interior design mixed with child rearing and theoretical physics. Nothing would feel right for me if I can't use my creative style as well as my intellect. So where does God want me? Why is this so hard for me to figure out when I have so many God given talents?

In the garden of eden God gave Adam a specific job. He was to name and care for the animals and plants. He was presumably pretty awesome at his job too especially without sin in the world. Eve was made to keep him company and assist him in his work. He trusted her very much and the garden was kept up. They were happy in the world God made for them.

In our time with all the sin in the world its no wonder we can't figure out what to do. With the end of that goodness in eden we are unable to see a world without sin. In God's plan each one of us does have a specific job. One that we will do incredibly well in His perfect heaven. Until then I suppose we have to wait. Finding a perfect job will nearly never happen as something in this world will always keep us wanting more, however fulfilling God's purpose for our lives is something we can do. He calls each one of us to spread His love and truth to this world. It is something he gave us gifts to help us along the way. Not only are these gifts a mix of superpowers specific to each person but they are something that He gives with time and prayer. We are able to cast out demons in His name and perform miracles to please God. The gifts He gives may be more specific in some than others, but each serves its purpose. To the people who knew what they wanted to be from a young age it may just be that their gift is so strong in them that the others seem nonexistent. They knew that their gift of teaching or nursing or whatever would guide them on God's path one day. For everyone else, your specific gifts are made to fill a need that someone without those many insights could do alone. Someone with creativity and leadership may guide someone with leadership only to follow a straighter path than they could alone.

God has purpose for us all and it will be shown in His time if we glorify Him along the way trusting that His will is the best thing there is.